January 1, 2001
Wow. I've been lazy in updating this damn journal :) So today, being the beginning of the true millennium, I feel that I should say a few words to the universe at large in the hopes that I can look back on this and learn.
God am I tired. I feel like the past few months have really worn me down and that really bothers me. It could be due to my SDS (Seasonal Depression Syndrome) but there has to be some basis for feeling tired of the world because it's a feeling I haven't had in quite some time.
It could be because I was/am in a very difficult point in my life relationshipwise.
It could be because I unintentionally caused myself some major drama that should have been avoided.
It could be because my car decided to die yesterday. *smile*
But one thing holds true that I have got to remember. Before Christmas, I had a dream. I don't remember the specifics (probably some sci-fi related dream with me as the hero :), but I do remember the message that I kept telling myself in the dream...
Don't give up. You can't let them beat you. And that is such a true statement. I didn't surive 26 years happily to let the Universe beat me into an emotionless husk. Alot has happened to me. I've learned alot of things about myself that I really have a problem with. I'll get to these in due time, but for today, I think I should list my New Year's Resolutions so I have them down somewhere to remind me.
- Lose weight. I'm not fat by any means, but I need to loose a little pud off my stomach. So starting on the 2nd, here's the deal: Mon, Wed, Fri - Cardio Tue, Thu - Strengthen and Conditioning
- Learn to be a better listener.
- Learn when to shut my mouth. :)
- Try and get more involved at work. Get more work done and learn advanced ways of doing things.
- Update my journal regularly :)
- Find a new sport. Being competitive is in my nature. I haven't been lately and I think that could be part of my unhappiness. Maybe start training for softball early this year in a batting cage. Maybe learn to ice skate. Maybe try and get back into gymnastics?
- Get over PB. Easier said than done. :)
- Work harder for the dance team.
- Learn Japanese. I have all the books and tapes. It's time I applied myself.
- Enter Grad School. It's time I got my Masters.
Change is good. Welcome to the next Millenium, everyone. Let's make it a good one.
Something a little more upbeat will be in my next entry, OK?
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