A Letter from John Q. Public

So let me preface this post with the fact that I did ask the sender if I could post his message here and respond to it. I thought it was too good to pass up as source material. I mean...this is about my life and this actually was sent :)

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Hey There, Cowboy-
What's up? Just wanted to say I've enjoyed the witty banter...you've made me laugh.

That said, and you being a complete stranger, I feel the need to share something...

In this 'Digital' age (touche?), when there is a fine line and only a one-letter difference between talking and stalking, I must admit that I snooped around your blogger. I clicked the 'Website' link here and away I went...

And I read about your Valentine's Day.

And I just want to ask, why are you there and why am I here?

You know, I am so damn sick of meeting people the opposite of you. I am so freeking tired trying, and putting it all out there, and ending up with selfish, asshole, queenie, duds...

I want to live happily ever after, and damnit I don't want to wait ANYMORE!

I don't know why I am sharing this with you, you are a complete stranger, except that I spent 10 minutes with your blogger...

so whatever.

Tired of being alone,
-JQP

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So this is what my response:

Dear JPQ,

I often feel like you do...I have a guy in every port except my own. :) (me being the flirt that I am...that's almost too true). I think for me, I have put effort into each relationship. Now sometimes it's not enough effort for the other person, but I have built a life that I am very happy with. I guess I took "You make your bed, you live in it" to heart.

I think that's one of the most wonderful things about life. I am in control of it. Well...I am in control of how I "react" to it. Mostimes anyway...hehe (damn emotions).

So you say that everyone turns out to be a dud. Well that is probably going to remain true for quite some time. I guess the phrase "It takes alot of lemons to make lemonade" really is true. I'm still going through lemons myself. Now most of these lemons are sweet while I have them...but they leave me with a bitter taste in my mouth (which is what I'm sensing from you letter). Why be upset that they turn out to be not what you need? Be GLAD you found out so early!

We all make bad choices and decisions. I think though, these are part of our growing into ourselves. I think with every failed relationship (friendship or romantic) I learn a little about what I want, what I don't want, and a LOT about myself. These are the growing pains of life.

I know I have to fight to NOT become the thing that I hate. I am not a bitter person. I think part of that is the fact that I have had interactions with enough bitter people to say to myself, "hey...this is NOT who I want to be" and I take ACTION.

Secret to success I once heard is to ACCEPT the situation, CONFRONT any obstacles, then MOVE ON to the next event. Easier said than done. Especially when emotions get involved. I'm not even sure what phase of that I am after this last one but I would like to think I am moving on. LOL :)

You say you want to live happily ever after...well what's stopping you? Build yourself a life that you are proud of. A person shouldn't be required to complete your life...they should be invited to enhance your life.

I know I have wanted to "give up" on several occasions. But if I really and truly did, then they would have won. These duds, jerks, arseholes, etc. will have taken away the chance for someone else to invite ME into their life. Do I really want to give them the satisfaction that they have "ruined me for any other man"?