Not so straight from the ATL, mixing one electric personality with a dash of humorous wit commenting on life, the universe, and everything.

Thursday, November 28, 2002

November 28th, 2002

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Lazy lazy day. Now last night? That's ANOTHER story... Picture it, Heretic on a wednesday night. For those of you NOT living in the ATL area, wednesday is "Dress Code" night at the 'Tic which means shirtless or leather.

Called a taxi at 10:00, arrived at the party around 10:30 and blew some serious cash. It's amazing how fast $$ files by when you're out to have a good time with a vengeance. Four Cowboy Cocksuckers and a Madris later (gosh, I need to switch to Madris's sooner...that one got me more loaded than the 4 CC's) I was trashed! (hence the Taxi).

Saw many of my friends there (and didn't see many of my friends that said they were there) because it was SOOOO packed. I love a big crowd. Even saw a few people from ICUII in person that were from out of town (how funny!).

My friend LB was nice enough to drive me home so I didn't have to get a taxi. I crashed big time when I hit the front door.

Today was nice. Woke up late, took a nice bath, had my workout then J stopped by on his way from on T'day dinner to another and then I kicked him out because I was late for mine! (hehehehe) Went over to my friend M & E apartment for ham, stuffing, potatoes, and cheesecake! YUM!

The evening was quiet as I watched "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone" yet AGAIN and then played on ICU for awhile.

Now it's time for bed!

Monday, November 25, 2002

November 25th, 2002

My cousin died. I was at her funeral in El Paso, TX this past weekend. The world seems a little bit quieter now... I bet all of you would have liked C. She was something else. That girl had more attitude than a drag queen in a pageant, but in a good way :) She was vibrant, true to her friends and family, and she was flat amazing.

We really hadn't talked in a few months, and let me tell you I feel like I have missed out on something. Last time we talked we were going to try and meet up somewhere soon and hang out. Unfortunately that will never happen.

So this was definitely a call for reflection. It's true what they say, you don't know what you got till it's gone. She was my favorite cousin (I know you're not supposed to have favorites!) because she was the most sane ;) That and I'd like to think we were a lot alike.

But this entry got a bit morose...C would NOT stand for it so I'll spice it up?

So Christmas is coming up. I am making my list now (and checking it twice). I'm in a "craftsy" kind of mood so I might be making some presents this year. I have some ideas that might pan out. Watching Trading Spaces helps a lot! (of course...Ty Pennington totally MAKES the show for me hehehehhee).

So as a public service message, I'm finishing this entry with a note...CALL your relatives...CALL your friends and just check in. Someday they might not be there...

Saturday, November 16, 2002

November 16th, 2002

So it's a rainy Saturday right now :) I'm listening to some new age music throughout the house doing my well overdue laundry and cleaning the house... I feel very content right now. Sure, it doesn't sound all that exciting, but sometimes it's just nice to breathe deeply and revel in the wonder that is existance.

I think too often we don't take time to enjoy the "now". It's kind of a luxury. I was sitting on the couch listening to the rain fall and my dog snoring under her blanket and just smiled.

Life is dramatic enough. I even had some very unexpected Drama wind it's way to me. I can't really talk much about it, except for the fact that it put things in a pretty clear perspective about certain people that I have crossed paths with.

Last night was fun (as usual) at the Heretic. Met up with a co-worker and some of his friends. Even met someone that asked me out (which is always a bonus). Tonight, am going to dinner with S and M and after that? Probably nothing unless I get another "gotta get out of the house" bug :)

But I am looking forward to my date with J tomorrow. I need to call him after I finish this journal entry to try and get an actual "schedule of events" pinned down.

I did see W out last night and he didn't really say a word to me. I really hope that those of you reading this take a clue and PLEASE, don't accept a second date or even say "I'd like to go out again" if you don't plan on pursuing it. It's MUCH worse than saying, "I had a great time, and though you're a lot of fun, I don't think you're right for me".

So I assume silence is that sentence for now. Perhaps I'm reading more into it than is there, but I believe I'm right :) And if W ever reads this, then perhaps I was wrong about my first impression of him. I figured he was a better person than to leave me hanging. Eh...welcome the the world, huh? :) It's full of long as you're not disappointed in yourself...we'll all be fine.

And I am happy with me :)

Sunday, November 10, 2002

November 10th, 2002

So this weekend was WAY fun. (And what was up with me in the drunken stupor last entry?) LOL. Saturday I pretty much just lazed around the house and then... I went to dinner and hung out with my two closest friends in Atlanta and had dinner.

Not going out Saturday was a good idea. Though I really really would have enjoyed it, the games on Sunday were at 10AM (meaning I had to wake up at 8AM to start fixing my hair hehehehhehe) and I wanted the sleep.

We won our first game and that put our team (Go Heretic Outlaws!) in first place for the Fall season!

So what is today's topic? Well I was told a couple of things today that I thought were pretty interesting.

  1. "heya sexy-thang, how are you? Read your journal entry, tsk tsk, let B. go......."
  2. "Your confidence really does show though, you are a very nice looking guy. I think good looks go with a confidence level"
I guess I should address these ;) For number one, I was on liqour and have no defense ;) I honestly still wish I could get together with that boy, but I am also a realist. It's just not in the cards or he would have called or e-mailed me or something by now if he wanted to.

For number two, I was very flattered by this. However it brought to light the fact that I think my confidence turns into "bitch" too easily sometimes. I really need to work on that. This week, perhaps I can try to note the times when I think I am being a turd. LOL. I don't want to be a turd...however, when faced with silly argumentative people, it gets me in a tizzy. Almost instantly ;)

BUT...let's talk about more fun ME! Hehhehehe. This week seems like it's going to be relatively quiet. I miss my best friend as he's been way sick lately with a cold. I swear if I get it, I'm going to be pissy. Maybe I should take that multivitamin before going to bed huh?

So Christmas being right around the corner, I need to get off my a$$ and start shopping NOW. I don't want to have to worry about that $hit later.

So tomorrow I guess I'll work on my Christmas list and hit the shops! Woo hoo! If it's one thing I'm really good at, it's shopping :)

Saturday, November 09, 2002

November 9th, 2002

Ugh. It's 3:42AM and I'm a bit drunk. I saw B at the Heretic while dancing and I guess I just really want to know where I went wrong. Or rather what went wrong... So I'm dancing with these boys doing the manwich thing (and I've been admiring them for some time) and I see B right behind them.

Stupidly I touched his shoulder to garner his attention. I guess part of me wanted him to see what he lost...kind of a re-affirmation that said "See...I am attractive...see...someone does want me..."

How futile and silly is that? I can't believe I let myself stoop that low. I just really wish that there was a chance in hell with B...but there's not and I guess the sooner I accept that, the better off I'll be huh?

Part of me wants to call him on the phone and offer whatever it takes to just get another chance. The other half, the spurned half, is telling me to let sleeping dogs lie, and to just forget it. I know that I would be good to him. Someday someone is going to recognize that fact.

*sigh* I guess I'd better quit my drunken rambling before I get myself in some trouble. On an up note, I did have a date with this guy W that I'm still ambiguous as if it went well or not. He was sick, so didn't kiss me goodnight (which in all honesty was very considerate) but because I weigh so much (more than I actually should) on people's actions I'm still unsure of where I stand. I guess I'm too used to demonstrative guys. :)

So I'd better go crash into bed. I should fall right asleep.

Sunday, November 03, 2002

November 3rd, 2002

WHAT a week! Phew. Sad it's over. So this has been quite an active week! If I had any more in there, I think I'd be overextending myself. So yours truly has been partying for like a week. This lil bod is NOT used to that at all :) Today I think I'm going to crash early (don't fret, I've set the VCR on).

Went out last night to the Red Chair for a cocktail and met this guy S that I met online. He was cute, but not quite my type (smoker) but he was fun to hang around. After that I went to the Heretic and had a BLAST dancing and meeting all sorts of boys. Dunno what magic spell I had on me last night, but it was working. Maybe I can get a repeat "casting" next weekend hehehehe.

Today I played in two softball games, the first one we shut them out with a 17-0 win and the second went into overtime with us victorious 10-9. Woo Hoo! That (I believe) put us in first place in our division! Yay!

However that was not today's big revelation. Today's revelation comes to us courtesy of "Neverwood". If I recall the line correctly, it was something like "For every innocence lost, the universe gives us back something in it wisdom, insight, knowlege, or simply a perfect moment". I really don't belive I've ever heard a truer word spoken.

Sometimes I feel remorse over losing aspects of my innocence. Many of them are long lost through the trials of my life...but a few...a select few...I'd like to think I still have a grasp on.

Today my friend L and I were talking about his situation with guys. It seems there has been another flake in his life (story sound familiar? If not, read my previous journal entries) and I basically told him if he gets bitter, he's let them won. I doubt if he even realizes how much I like him. I'm not his type and our friendship would suffer so I'll never say or do anything in that arena. I know it's not a place I'm destined to go and I'm cool with that.

Everything's quiet on the man-front, so there's not too much to report there. I don't remember if I told ya'll but I did win like 0 in cash and prizes for my Halloween Costume. I've really got to track down some photos of that.

Until next time, ya'll keep it cool!