I'm so over painting...

I am SO...OVER...PAINTING.

So over that I have decided to say "Frell THAT" and take two days off. So instead I went out and about shopping. I bought a sweet red shirt with a bull head (like the Longhorn logo) and the words "Branded" on it (awesome for a night at Hoedowns!) and...A BOWLING BALL! Check it:

AND...it was on...SALE! We like that! So I went to Sports Authority to go look and they had some 14 pounders that I was looking at getting but I saw this one (that they didn't have in stock in a 14) in a sale bin and it was a 12 pound ball for 50% off. I figure you can't go wrong with a $20 ball. Even if I don't like it, its not a total loss. But if I DO like it...that's a deal! I also picked up some bowling shoes and a bowling bag. I figure I would add a patch I have to the bag to personalize it. As I always say, "Just because you bought it that way, doesn't mean it has to stay that way!" :)

I have enjoyed this week off. I need to relax more often. Speaking of relaxing...I am going to take a nap! That's right...NO PAINTING TODAY, bitches. Tomorrow? Yeah...I'm needing to finish this off so I can just enjoy the room. One good second coat and some touch ups should do it...maybe...I hope ;)

This sucks.

It's both a pleasure and a pain knowing that you will always have feelings for someone. :) I really wanted to call my ex on Christmas and say "Happy Holidays" but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Don't know whether it was pride or not...I think it was because I wasn't sure what the reaction was going to be. Our last exchanges were not that pretty. :) But that's what you do when you break up...you go through all the things that you believed were wrong, spell them out, and then shut them out.

I burned my butt in the tanning bed too. Add insult to injury LOL :) But today is going to be a GORGEOUS day and I am hoping to get some wood and start repairing my staircase. That...and hopefully finish painting this damn room. :) THREE DAYS! I think I am high from the fumes. Maybe that's the reason for my melancholy.

Time for some good music!

Happy Christmas

My thoughts are brought to lyrics that John Lennon wrote in his song "Happy Christmas (War Is Over)". I feel that today...it's very appropriate.

So this is Christmas
And what have you done
Another year over
And a new one just begun

And so this is Christmas
I hope you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young

A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good one
Without any fear

It reminds me to take reflection on the year and that a renewal is coming. Any shortcomings and challenges I had, I have new opportunities to overcome them. Today isn't exactly the Christmas I envisioned a number of months ago. But here in the quiet...I am at peace.

Crimmas Eve 2006

Friday, my friend/sista (haha) David came into town on his way through to Nashville. We went out to Amsterdam (a bar here in ATL) and got a little bit lit up (this is an awful picture):

 My best friend Larry joined us later in the evening and it was nice to see him before he left for his Mom's up in North Carolina.

But yesterday was an errand day and I ran around getting groceries and wine (the most important part of a holiday party...the alcohol!) A hundred dollars later I had a trunkful:

 After THAT, I got a wild hair up my butt and decided to go buy some paint and start in on painting my "upstairs den". It's going to be kind of a monochromatic theme (black/white/grey) with some red accents. It's about time I put some energy into that room. I spend a good bit of time in it.

 I woke up at 8:30AM this morning, decided to chill with some Final Fantasy XII, and then started cooking at 10:30AM. I'm making these things called "chicken yummies" for about 4 guests which are kind of a dumpling style thing. They always get rave reviews. I just finished prepping them so now all I have to do is stick them in the oven later today. Got three bottles of wine, a chardonnay, a zinfindel, and a merlot. Figure that should cover the tastes. Chilling the vodka in case anyone wants to do some flavor shots. Doubtful, but I might want some LOL :)

Christmas tomorrow I think will be a very quiet day for me. My big plans are to wake up, open a few presents from my family, bake the traditional cinnamon rolls (and make a pig of myself and eat all eight of them), play some Final Fantasy XII, and later meet up with some friends for a movie and possibly some Chinese food. I have been a BAD boy with eating and I can feel a bit bloaty, but it's all good. I'll just spend a few hours at the gym after the holidays and knock it back off (thank goodness for a high metabolism).

I have all this coming week off so I am going to finish up painting this room and try and do some outstanding home repairs. Looking forward to trying out my new miter saw that Mom bought me for my Christmas present. I bought some OH so fashionable (not) safety glasses...safety first when dealing with flying bits of wood you know!

I hope everyone has an amazing holiday (whichever you decide to celebrate): Christmas, Winter Solstice, Hanukkah, Quanza, or my personal favorite...Festivus...the holiday for the "Rest of Us" :)

Last Day of Work for Awhile...It's Party Time!

So today is my last day at work for about a week and a half :) I'm one of the few guys in town so hopefully (cross fingers) nothing breaks :)

I have a number of projects that are on my docket to complete over the break:

1. Paint my spare bedroom/playroom (going to be a nice warm grey tone)
2. Finish 2 art projects and mail them out for my sisters
3. Repair my staircase (it's been kind of in disrepair for awhile! I'll take pictures)

Hopefully we get to leave early soon. :) In the meantime it's mostly office small talk and hanging out. I can't get pieces of this code I am working on to work because I don't think I quite understand the module that my coworker wrote LOL :) It can wait until the new year.

I have an old buddy of mine making a stop over to crash on his way to visit his family up in Nashville, TN. I figure we may go out on the town...depends on if he's being a tired bizatch after all that driving from Orlando, FL.

But hoping to get the house clean later today and do lots and lots of laundry. EXCITING times for the Glow-Go-Boy.

I'm finally starting to feel a bit more "normal" as far as my heart is concerned. Its funny how you get used to someone being around. There's still an empty space, but its filling itself in, much like a rip in the time-space continuum does self-repair. I have been doing some reading up on a few "relationship" things as well as further reading on "control issues". Trying to educate myself, evaluate my own behavior, and make some changes. I feel better about some things that occurred that I honestly had some doubts on. Talked with a few people, some just friends, others professionals. What is life but a big learning experience for our next lives, eh? (If you subscribe to that line of thought)

Getting up at 5AM sucks!

I had to get up early today at 5AM for a server cut over. We have to sometimes do machine maintenance when people aren't using it. Thankfully, I had my new partner in crime there to catch a few things that were wrong and it made having to work that early almost bearable.

Thankfully, I got to go home early and take a nap. Now I'm contemplating if I have the desire to go to the gym. I'm a bit sad about a number of things...makes me not want to go :)

I've had a lot of time recently to think about the upcoming year. I've got to start making some goals for myself. I guess you could say that THIS New Year...I'm really going to try and stick with my resolutions. I should probably write them down...turn them into a piece of wall art so that they stare me in the face every day, forcing them to be acknowledged.

I had a big compliment today when talking to a friend. He told me that one of the things that drew him to me was that I don't care what people think and I "march to the beat of my own drum". *laugh* If I could count the number of times I have heard people use that phrase to describe me, I'd have my house paid off.

I was telling him that for some reason, over the course of the past few months, I had lost my self-confidence and for some strange reason...I feel like I let go of my self-worth. It's the strangest thing to look back on myself in recent history and wonder "Who WAS that person?" I feel like I'm at a crossroads. I am looking forward to rediscovering the world with what feels like a new set of eyes...acquired wisdom...whatever you want to call it. I guess I need to figure out what to do with all this energy. It lacks focus right now. But I also think that it's not the right time to do anything with it. Just see what events transpire around me for awhile. Enjoy riding my bike without holding on to the handlebars. That kind of thing.

On a less enigmatic front, I sold 8 lights total now and got a nice down payment for my Wii (if I can ever find one of the little buggers). I have a few ideas on how to make some different "models" that I can sell during the "normal year". I just have to find an easier way to drill the glass LOL :) Let me tell you...drilling that glass is a pain. But it keeps my mind off of a few things.

Impending Holidays!

Well my Christmas holiday shopping isn't over yet damnit! My sisters are just about the most impossible things to shop for. I have been out two weekends in a row looking for something and I am just about down to sending them money. I went ahead and sent the niece's and three nephews their Christmas Cash.

I have two pieces of artwork that I did that each of them gets one. I will have to take a picture of them and post them on the site once the second one is complete. I may try and go ahead and squeeze one more out of my arse and send each of them :) I have to wrap one tonight up.

I so totally do not want to be at work anymore today. I am finding it really hard to concentrate (hence my blog offering). But on my way home, I am going to hop into the tanning bed and then go to the gym late today (if I get all my work done). Otherwise I'll just tone up at home.

I learned that I have to start eating more. I have lost like 10 pounds in the past six months. I am thinking that I have stressed myself out about so many things and I was overly concerned with what I was eating. I'm still eating healthy, just allowing myself to have a few more carbs and sugars. I think my metabolism (thankfully) is just so high. If I want to put on muscle weight again, I have to EAT! :)

I haven't really been sleeping well lately either...I just need to find my center again. I may take a trip down to the beach or something after the New Year. Get some rays...commune with the water forces...read a book. I think that might be exactly what the Doctor ordered.

Holiday Parties and Shows

So this past weekend my misadventures resumed with a night on the town with one of my best friends, Danny. I had a chairless housewarming party at one of my work friends' new house a ways off I-75. It was a really nice space and I think it had a lot of potential. LOTS of space (I could get lost!). Afterwards (it is so rare that Danny gets a wild hair and wants to go out) we went to Hoedowns and danced the night away.

The next day, I woke up, got out the door to purchase supplies for the lights that I make. Then I spent the next like 6 hours wrapping, drilling, and stuffing! (No, I wasn't having sex! :) The lights were a big hit, but unfortunately I only sold two. So I'm going to have to figure out a new strategy to sell them. I actually can redesign the things so that I can sell them after the holidays by turning them into "artistic creations" without the bows :) I took my creations to sell at the Hotlanta Softball Holiday Drag Extravaganza and I donated one to raffle off to the Chris Rainbow Program (which funny enough, my best friend Larry won it...and I had already given him one the year before LOL). The show was very enjoyable and some of the acts were surprisingly funny. Twice wigs fell off and everyone busted out laughing but the performers kept on!

Afterwards, Mikey and Dean dragged me over to the Heretic where I saw all sorts of people I hadn't seen in awhile so it was nice to catch up and say "Happy Holidays!" I had a long day on Sunday coming up so I headed out a little after midnight.

Sunday was my "Gettin' Er' Done" day...or at least it was a feeble attempt at it ;) I went out after lunch on a quest to finish up my holiday shopping. Started at Macy's and JCPenny looking for some jewelry for my sisters but everything I liked was made of crappy plastic and I like REAL materials like glass and natural stones. I did end up buying myself a new brown cap and scarf ($10 for both!) at Old Navy because it does get cold every once and awhile.

Then it was off to Hancock Fabrics, The Home Store, and then Target to try and find some curtains for my upstairs spare room. I was looking for a modern/trendy black and white print since that room is going to be designed around a monochromatic scheme (with red accents). Didn't find a damn thing so I went to IKEA where I got the comforter and pillowcases for that room. They actually sell fabric and I found the perfect stuff to make my curtains from. I think I did a pretty good job considering I just used this iron on stuff to do the hems. Check it out:

[Insert picture here when you get home]

Things (post-David) are getting back to normal. Not really looking, but I have had a few people express interest. I don't think I desire anything right now other than some quiet time with me, my dog, and a few nice video games that I haven't had time to spent some quality time with. It has been a lot quieter and I realized that I definitely missed my "me" time.

I need to get off my butt and start planning my 3rd annual Christmas Eve Dinner. I generally host a potluck for my friends and neighbors that are still around. We get a few bottles of wine and watch a movie on my big screen TV :)

But hope everyone has gotten their holiday shopping done. I know I have to get out the door again this weekend and not return home until it is DONE.

It's A Little Too Late, I'm a Little Too Gone

Love that song right now (by the talented Toby Keith). So, my romantic relationship with David is over (pour gasoline on it, Betty). Long story, many issues.

I did learn a good many things about myself. I learned that I have a form of "controller" personality in the guise of "the fixer" mentality (see this website). That's definitely something I think I can get a hold on.

I told a friend of mine what happened and I remember saying, "I guess I am just not cut out to hold down a relationship" and he said to me, "Actually, you are ready. I saw you do things recently that I have never seen you do for anyone before. You ARE ready, you just aren't with the right person."

I certainly handled a number of things wrong :) When I tried to fix some of them, attempt to react differently than before, or stand my own ground, things deteriorated rapidly. I definitely was a schmuck. I dug myself into a few holes that it is going to take a lot of work to get out of. Nothing I can't handle with a positive attitude.

On a lighter note, my quest for the Wii was a complete and utter failure. I guess I should have gotten up like at 5AM to wait outside of Target...FRELL that! Haha! I have Final Fantasy XII to play anyway. It's awesome.

Last night I sighed a couple of times really loud. Breathe out stale history, breathe in a brighter future. I'll be fine. In fact...I'm almost there already.

An Uncertain (but promising) Renewal

So David and I have talked and we're both of the mind to give things another go. I've been asked not to talk about things on here ;) I was using this kind of as a forum to get a few things across so I am probably going to limit my ramblings to other exciting things BESIDES the ups and downs of my relationship :)

I'm sure, however, to talk about any funny occurrences (as we have quite a few of those).

Had to work at Woofs on Friday and Saturday I went and kept my friend Danny company during his ID check shift. It's amazing how bitchy people can be about showing their IDs. I mean, it's not like we made the laws. We know some of you are older than dirt and knew Moses personally, however, we are required by our friendly neighborhood establishment to make sure that you have your ID. I want to get a shirt made that says, "Yes, I DO have to see your ID". I mean, we're always polite, but you'd think that regulars to the bar would get used to showing their ID.

Bitches.

I am going to wake up early tomorrow and try and get a Nintendo Wii. It's this years' Christmas Present to Myself (tm). Wish me luck! If I do get it, I may lock it away from myself until Christmas. (Yeah...riiiiight LOL :)